January 30, 2015

New Year Goals

 I still had my 2015 Resolutions document open.  Always one to look at a new year as a fresh start, goals for the coming year were neatly listed under a few categories: family, personal, financial, spiritual.  Nothing like a slap of reality to change priorities.  Nothing like learning that all the dreams and hopes for life as a family of four aren’t going to be fulfilled.  Nothing like the sweet smell of newborn being taken away before he’s even here.  (Can you guess that today has been a rough one?)  They weren’t bad, but after such a swift priority realignment even those good goals looked meaningless.  Writing four letters a month?  Moving into a place with two bedrooms?  Build our savings account to X?  Pray weekly for those we give money to?  As I said, nothing horrible but is that really what I want this year to be focused on?  Aside from the last one, no.  I did a quick rewrite, just three, no order of importance.  Three things I want to define this new year. 

                1. Survive knowing that Graham won’t. 
                2. Love my Lord with everything I am, trust him with everything and everyone. 
                3. Love Brad, James and Graham deeply in a way that they feel, know and do not doubt it. 

Sitting back, and reading the words on the screen...I thought yes.  That is what I want.  That is what I this year to be filled with...more un-doubtable, risky, beautiful love.

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