March 21, 2014

New Motherhood: what it is

I'm no professional.  Did I need to even say that?  Well, lets just make sure we're all on the same page.  I have been a mama for six months...at times it has flown by and at time is has dragged on for eternities. These are just a few thoughts on what it has been like for me in these moments/years that have been six months.

Motherhood is every wonderful moment you can imagine squeezed into two second clips.

Motherhood is crying because you really do have the most amazing/happy/beautiful child in the entire world.

Motherhood is crying with him when you can't stem the bleeding from snipping him with the nail clippers.

Motherhood is crying over him when he falls asleep on your chest all warm, content and totally at peace...basically there is a lot of crying.

Motherhood is deepening my emotional responses...and I'm pretty full of emotions to begin with. :)  Some good and some not so great...the crazy has been released...be careful.

Motherhood is soaking in the adoring looks he gives you when he wakes up and yours is the first face he wants to see.  I want to capture every morning smile and keep it forever.

Motherhood is mentally deeming him the bipolar dictator because those heartwarming smiles can quickly turn into ear-shattering screams for hours on end.

Motherhood is doing everything possible to keep your little person happy and rested and comfortable because you really do want them to have the best possible.

Motherhood is being "on"   a   l   l   the time...even if all you really want to do is snuggle on the couch with your hubby sans baby and watch a movie.

Motherhood is a stark look at how selfish you really are as a person...sometimes it isn't pretty.

Motherhood is letting go of having and wanting to have a clean house/empty sink.  Oh dishes, can't you just wash yourselves?

Motherhood is only having one fingernail painted because you thought this nap would last long enough for both breakfast and some quick self-care, but alas it did not.

Motherhood is humbling because you have been given the honor/responsibility to raise this little person.

Motherhood is opening doors for friendships because really everyone wants to talk to/about the baby.

Motherhood is seeing your baby transition toward independence already.

Motherhood is hard.  It is full of nights where he has woken up 5 times already, but he is still hangry (hungry/angry) and won't fall asleep until you put him in the big bed thus making your little snippets of sleep even less restful...ahem...hangry runs in the family.

Motherhood is realizing the babe in your arms is a little 15 lb person!

Motherhood is not what I thought it was going to be.  I thought it would be easier and harder.  I thought the sweet times would be great, but I didn't realize how amazing they actually would be.  It is an incredible feeling to see your son, your son, reach out and touch your face...so presh...only to have that loving hand turn into a claw,which proceeds to draw blood across your cheek.  That feeling of love and adoring quickly turning to pain and irritation.  I always thought I was cut out to be a mom, but really some days I feel like nothing could be further from the truth.  It is a good thing God gives us grace because without it I don't know what I'd do.  

4 comments:

  1. Your truth and honesty gives me fear and excitement all at the same time. :)

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    1. I hope you let the excitement outweigh the fear...because it is MUCH more wonderful than terrible! :)

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  2. I love the blog posts you write that make me laugh out loud, this one included.

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    1. :) Glad to bring some laughter to your day...also can't wait to see you guys in May!!

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